In our age of pluralism and diversity, the concept of difference is attracting a lot of attention. The subject of difference is often a touchy one, as applied to race relations for example, and where it deals with emotionally charged issues, there is much confusion around the idea. We know we can't do without the concept of difference, but we can't seem to do well with it either.

In an effort to bring in some clarity I would like to introduce the concept of "different differences," or more specifically, as applied here, "vertical difference" and "horizontal difference". Both dimensions are well represented by the symbol of a cross or plus sign.

The vertical (VT) dimension has to do with what is considered good and bad, true and false, real and unreal. It is the human dimension of value judgments. The horizontal (HZ) dimension is where all is equally valid and true and no particular element or aspect is "higher" or "lower", or "better" or "worse" than another.

This seems to be fairly simple, until it is put into practice. The critical question is, "Who is to say what belongs to the VT and what to the HZ dimension?" And for the VT dimension, who's to say what is higher or lower? There is no final authority and to impose one's own values on others is self-defeating. This perspective claims that all perspectives are equally valid, and that the VT dimension is totally arbitrary, making it impractical, if not harmful. The VT dimension has indeed been harmful in the past. Wars and injustices have been perpetrated on the assumption that one's own, the group's, or the prevailing set of values were more valid than another's.

But to hold the position that only the HZ dimension has any validity is to make a statement that is in itself VT. In other words, it contradicts itself. But this is not the only difficulty, for the vertical is the dimension of values and meaning, and one does away with it at one's own peril. "If everything carries equal weight, then nothing is important."[1] The VT and HZ dimensions are complementary, each needing the other to provide a complete picture and to keep the other in balance.

Using both the VT and HZ dimensions provides us with a framework that is helpful in distinguishing between types of differences. In any situation, I can ask myself how reality is being partitioned into HZ and the VT, and if this is made explicit or implicit. I can also ask what is VT and HZ for myself. This will help me to navigate the waters of communication and relationships with more awareness and skill.

But the significance of this framework goes further, and in saying the following I am expressing my own interpretation of VT and HZ dimensions which you are free to accept or reject. In my work as a therapist or personal coach, my aim is to guide a person in navigating from a state of confusion, illusion, fragmentation, or deception to one of clarity, integrity, and authenticity. It is my belief that a shift from the former to the latter is able to bring one closer to a distinction between the VT and HZ that is "valid". This validity exists in a realm that is inaccessible to those who have not worked through their own personal "baggage." Being attached to and identified with certain illusions and distortions prevent us from becoming aware of and part of a larger picture. Once in touch with this realm, there appears to be a consensus on a value system beyond one's own personal, cultural, or national perspective. (One example of this consensus is the universality of the Golden Rule in religious and ethical systems around the world and through the ages.) In that realm there is a diversity which values and acknowledges all difference, where both strengths and weaknesses are accepted without being used against others.

One area of application of horizontal and vertical difference is to the concept of the person. You may be acquainted with the terms "pre-personal", "personal" and "transpersonal." In my view another category called "sub- (or semi-) personal" needs to be added to this list. A person can become entangled in projections, illusions, distortions and addictions and this can limit that person not only from seeing clearly but also from acting in a personable way. The comment is often heard that such a person is looking through colored glasses. In fact, the color is a reference to the dependencies and distortions that form the filters through which we look. "For now we see through a glass, darkly;" says St. Paul, "but then, face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known."[3] When we come to see clearly, we will see significant differences we previously overlooked.

The same is the case for individual people. In other words, when an individual truly becomes a person, he or she will see the subtle differences that were missed before. There is a great and noble diversity in those who have gone beyond their own strengths and talents on the one hand, and their weaknesses and shortcomings on the other, to reach an existence where they are both completely themselves and also at one with others. This is the true cutting edge, where a person can learn to grow into areas that were previously inaccessible. Here he or she meets truly new things.

But where does that point between the sub-personal and the personal lie? When can a person call him or herself truly a person? I propose:

• when he or she can maintain a balance between him or herself and the greater good,
• when he or she can put him or herself in the background of the larger humanity,
• when he or she becomes of service to the greater good more than considering his or her own particular welfare, without sacrificing self-care,
• when he or she intuitively knows that what he or she is doing is right,
• when he or she does not need to gain the approval of others, but is led by an inner conviction and guidance/approval to do what he or she is doing.

As it is, every person, nation, culture, race, etc. has qualities that belong to both the VT and HZ dimensions. Each quality has a VT and HZ component, but it usually leans predominantly toward one or the other. Our task is to sort through these and develop an understanding that helps us in separating the components and knowing what belongs to what. Some evaluations are based on our own personal qualities, and some on what "reality" accepts or rejects. Whether we confuse the two or discern clearly, life quickly and constantly provides us with feedback to help us adjust our evaluations. And whether we actually listen and respond depends on how much we have invested ourselves into (or identified with) our level of understanding.

It is my hope that the concept of VT and HZ difference will provide a framework that helps to distinguish between "different differences." The capacity to do so will help us to navigate through the snares of life to those places of peace for which there is a deep longing in our heart.

Notes
1. Alan Jones, Passion for Pilgrimage. San Francisco: Harper & Row, 1989, p.60.
2. The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations, 3rd edition. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1980, p.551.
3. 1 Corinthians 13: 12

Copyright ©1997, Dirk Kelder, e-mail: info[at]polaritydynamics.com