Different Differences

Polarity
Dynamics

Unity – Diversity

Different Differences

Groups or communities come together based on what they share, on what is similar among the members, normally called the common ground. This commonality can generate a strong fervor and cohesiveness, especially in the group's beginning stages. It enables the group to move forward for an indefinite period of time until things settle down and become somewhat routine and accepted. What happens then is something we have all experienced in being part of a group. This is when our uniqueness comes to the surface and needs to be addressed. Until then, we have put our individuality on a shelf so that the group energy can flourish and become strong. Besides, this provides lots of energy to the members of the group, inspiring harmonious social interactions.

When things settle down and become more routine, however, changes normally start happening. Those qualities and differences that were put aside for the sake and benefit of the group now come forward and need to be addressed. Who each person is as an individual (i.e. a separate, unique person), also needs to be honored and valued as part of the group process. If this does not occur, there is a danger that the group members will split off their personal life from the group life. If the members' qualities and values that interfere with the unity of the group have been put aside, a time will come when each individual needs to bring them out of hiding in order to maintain his or her integrity.

All members are normally aware, albeit unconsciously, that expressing a quality that is alien to the group brings the risk of being judged and perhaps even cast out of the group. Unfortunately it often happens that many, if not most of the members, choose to continue to suppress their individuality within the group. Those who do express it, usually do this outside of the group context. Although the group remains together, eventually its life begins to dwindle and this will continue to the point where corruption sets in, marking the imminent end of the group. Unfortunately there are members who will rise up within the group to use this situation for their own benefit, feeding off a dying plant like a fungus. Those members who choose to stay within this context will fall with the group when it collapses.

When a member does decide to bring forth a quality which is counter to the group, the glue that held the group together can start to weaken, often to the point of threatening the very foundation and existence of the group. The possibility of the group breaking up generates a tension often stronger than many members can bear. Using our present framework of awareness and understanding, this tension can only remain unresolved, and will grow to the point where the person in question leaves the group, or the group (or individuals within the group) falls apart. This tension is certainly felt by everyone, largely on an unconscious level, and is not understood by most except perhaps the leader. It often happens that the leader, with the support of many group members, in order to find relief from this pressure and also to keep the group from falling apart, finds a scapegoat who will come to bear the heavy burden of those inherent and unseen tensions. The initial response of most members to this is to welcome the easing of their load.

Another possible scenario, one that is experienced more often, especially in this postmodern age of deconstruction, is where a member expresses him or herself in a way that is not only counter to the group, but is excessively individualistic to the point where it has become not just difficult, but impossible for the group to integrate. This occurs in the situation referred to above where the members have neglected to express their individuality to the extent that the group life has suffered and begun to disintegrate. Not only does the group take on a dysfunctional quality but the members as well, and since the power of the group has weakened, together with the anger felt from what has happened, some members feel compelled to express these dysfunctional qualities in order to feel some release from them. But rather than providing a benefit for either them or the group, this behavior can only be considered subversive and contributes to the malaise and downfall of both the group and its members. Although this dynamic is not restricted to a postmodern context, what Gertrude Himmelfarb writes in her book On Looking into the Abyss seems quite accurate here: "Postmodernism entices us with the siren call of liberation and creativity, but it may be an invitation to intellectual and moral suicide." (Alfred A Knopf, 1994, p.160).

It seems to me political correctness emerged as a result of the inability to discern between an individuality that is positive and/or creative, and one that is destructive and promotes fragmentation. But this is where a discernment of difference is so critical. Wherever there are differences there will be tension, but tension in and of itself is neutral. Without tension there would be no life, and a life-giving tension is sometimes called a creative tension. This tension tends to work itself out and to produce new and creative things. The other tension can be called destructive tension for very little, if any, good comes out of it.

The expression of individuality is of two kinds. One type of individual expresses him or herself just for the sake of expression, to get attention to feed their pride, vanity or lack of self-confidence, or for another such self-centered reason. The other type uses self-expression as a tool for their creativity, to convey who they really are and relay that to the world at large. The difference between these two in terms of their effect on any situation or group is like night and day. Up to now, based on our current mode of perception and/or standards of discernment, it has been difficult, if not impossible, to tell these two apart outright. But we don’t have to wait until the damage has been done to discern between these two types. Taking advantage of the clearer sight offered to us by Xenn Polarity in these realms we can more readily be aware of what is happening and what is behind it. No longer need we be tied down to the over-general concept of political correctness to determine our response, for in any given situation, Xenn Polarity enables us to know what is appropriate and/or beneficial, and what is not.

Feedback or comments welcome.
Dirk Kelder
May 30, 2010.