"What all persons have in common is their uniqueness."
-- Sam Keen & Anne Valley Fox, Telling Your Story

Introduction

As a human being I am not here to cater to the whims and wishes of others. But neither am I here to indulge in my own cravings and lusts. In between these two extremes there is ample room for two complementary concerns or needs. The first is to be myself, to do those things I feel I am here to do, both for the benefit and development of myself and the world at large. First and foremost, I need to be true to myself regardless of what others think. Neglecting that makes all else a pretense. Each of us needs to find the courage to find our own values and stand up for them in the face of opposition. For this we must have a sense of personal worth and power so that we can live our own lives and take responsibility for ourselves.

But this represents only half of what we are called to be. Although we need to become whole and our own person, these are not possible solely on our own. There is every reason to spend my time and energy in being kind to and caring for others. I do not exist alone in this world and my own well-being is tied to the well-being of those around me. I need others to help me find myself. I need others to complete those characteristics which I will never be and which I also need to nurture myself. And there will be times when I need others to pick me up when I fall apart and to support me when all seems futile. Both a sense of personal uniqueness and a sense of community is necessary for a healthy society and for healthy individuals.

Hence Sui Generis. It celebrates uniqueness, honors the need of individuals to express their originality and creativity, and supports their quest to be true to who they are. Additionally Sui Generis also supports the complementary need of individuals to be part of a community. It provides the theoretical foundation that makes it possible to embrace and live out these two complementary and often conflicting needs.

In short, Sui Generis addresses two basic complementary needs of each individual person. The first is the ability to be or become who one is, to be true to oneself, and express that. The second is the ability to listen to, receive, welcome, and include others, to communicate, to be a social being. In the past these qualities have often been contrary and conflicting, but discord is not necessary. They conflict when each tries to do without the other and the situation becomes polarized. Each goes to excess and eventually the situation breaks down.

This polarization is in fact what we see happening in some major parts or aspects of our society. On the one hand we are experiencing a "mass" society where the individual is increasingly losing his or her individuality and becoming a number. On the other hand, we find people fighting against this either by becoming fanatical or grotesque in character or appearance, or by joining an "exclusive" club. These people attempt to be original but succeed only in conforming to something different. To be healthy, both society and individuality need each other. A new understanding is needed that will promote and enable this tension between them to become a creative (rather than destructive) tension. Polarity Dynamics, in particular Xenn Polarity, provides such an understanding in the form of a cognitive structure or framework, within which neither option goes to an extreme. On the contrary, each is challenged to bring out what is truly valid and constructive within itself and the other.

There is often an unwritten rule or agenda in human relations that says, "In order for us to get along we have to think the same way about certain things." And in being part of a group or community the message is, "In order for you to be in our group you have to think like us on some basic issues." In both cases, the underlying message is: "For these basic issues, you have to have the same opinions and consider that the same things are important and feel the same way about them. That's the bottom line." This is an "in or out" decision, an "either/or" situation.

If this is the case, as is often my experience, how can this be addressed? It is our understanding that there is a truth in the other's position that needs to be honoured. There does need to be a basic agreement for people to see eye-to-eye and come to a position of unity. But if that comes at the expense of individuality or uniqueness to the extent that there is little room for it, the price is too high to pay. Where do we draw the line? If there were a supposed "objective" way to see this situation that gives some clarity to it, as would exist in a scientific, rational setting, this would provide a way through the maze and avoid some of the potholes and the quagmire. Unfortunately there is no "objective" way, which is the reason we often find ourselves in a pothole or quagmire. And since we are not dealing with "objective reality," using the so-called scientific approach here puts the situation into even more of a quagmire.

But that does't mean the only thing left for us is to deal with it in an exclusively "subjective" way. There is a third way which Xenn Polarity speaks about and which Sui Generis uses to resolve these issues in a way that is satisfactory for all concerned. That is not to say that it is based merely on compromise. It is based on a method of cognition that facilitates the ability to "see" previously "invisible" connections and relationships. On this basis something can be built that honours both sides of the difficulty. Where before there was disharmony and discomfort, there can now be harmony and agreement. This approach, based on Xenn Polarity, does not unrealistically or necessarily avoid the tension. It is a tool for the transformation of destructive tension into creative tension.

Community

Conceptually, Sui Generis is both a Community and a School. As a community, Sui Generis does not necessarily conform to any procedures, regulations or norms. Nor does it seek or promote originality or nonconformity for its own sake. We all yearn to let our light shine and to somehow get support for that from others, or at least have it acknowledged by others. Perhaps the primary benefit in being part of the Sui Generis Community is the recognition within oneself of the importance to be true to oneself and declare this to the world. But being part of Sui Generis is not like being part of any other community. More at the community page.

School

We are all here to learn, and we all have different things to learn. Sui Generis School is a diferent school in that it "has nothing to teach". Although that is true, this statement is too extreme. We could say that it teaches by not teaching. It teaches paradox and it teaches by way of paradox. No other way will do in the time in which we now live. But that doesn't mean this is for everyone. Only those who recognize the truth and value of this will get something out of what Sui Generis School offers. More at the school page.